Can someone tell me what a seven-year old is doing playing Halo 2? And while you’re at it, can you tell me why he’s probably a trillion times better at it than me? Lil Poison, indeed.


  1. Q) What is a seven-year old doing playing Halo 2?

    A) He is making money having fun is what he is doing. The little bastard. I hate him.

    Q) Why is he a trillion times better than me at it?

    A) Because he doesn’t have to go to a real job and waste valuable time working that could be used playing and getting better. In order to catch up to this kid (did I mention I hate him?) I will need to quit my job and devote at least 18 hours a day to playing. By the time the electric company turns off the power due to lack of payment he will only be 500 billion time better than me. That will be sweet!

  2. When I was 7, I could beat Contra with a friend, without using the Konami Code, because that was all we really had to do at that age. If I were to try now, I would fail miserably.

    Similarly, I bet I could kick his ass straight to the moon in Advance Wars or some other relatively strategic game. Or maybe even Tetris Attack.

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