Star Wars: TFU for $10?

Amazon’s Deal of the Day is the 360 version of Star Wars: The Force Unleased. At $10, it now fits our criteria from rent to buy. It’s a frustration that’s worth the $10–if you’re into that.

[2 Minute Review] Star Wars: The Force Unleashed

Note: This review is full of light spoilers but does not divulge the outcome or major points of the plot.

Can a game cause a person to embrace the dark side?

Yes, one feels the hatred flowing through them while playing this game. One also feels the elation of redemption once it’s all over.

DO: You are every Star Wars fan’s dream. Kill anything that moves using Force powers–with ultimate effect.

3rd person action platformer

PLATFORM: 360 and PS3 (in this iteration) (360 version reviewed here)


MEAT: Made an orphan by Darth Vader and impressed to become his adept in the Force the player is forced (heh) to become a double agent and start an uprising for the purpose of Vader wanting to overcome the Emperor and have you rule at his side. Premise aside the game is an ongoing trial of frustration. Storm Troopers can block Force powers and unwieldy camera angles make knowing where the action is rather difficult. The camera also helps in missing numerous jumps when it comes to certain levels. Throw in a useless save system and some broken save points and you tend to know what it’s like to experience the extreme power of the dark side. On more than one occasion I felt as if I could Force pull the disc from the 360 tray. The game looks and sounds great, and only during the endgame when you have most of your powers at their full potential does the game play tend to get exciting. Perhaps though the most squandered potential of any video game moment of all time is lost during the often advertised Star Destroyer scene. You’re tasked to use your Force powers to pull it down right out of the sky. Instead of being an epic moment, it becomes one of trial and error and then develops a sense of defecating relief once it’s over. The following cut scene barely manages to cover that guffaw. However that leads me to the game’s redeeming moment: the story. Let me finish by saying that it ranks in the top three of Star Wars stories grouped with The Empire Strikes Back and Knights of the Old Republic. I’ve only done this once before playing a video game, but I teared up during the final cut scene. Maybe my frustration of playing gave way to an empathy with the frustration that the apprentice felt?

PERKS: wielding the Force in its full glory is awesome; excellent graphic design, sound effects, and soundtrack; one of the greatest Star Wars stories–is it any wonder Lucas considers the game canon?

SCREAMS: to have been play tested–by people; to have better enemy awareness; to have an enemy AI other than throwing wave after wave of troopers at you; to display real lightsaber effects and not essentially be a lit wooden pole; to not have Quick Timed Events; to have a better Force power progression; to be made into a proper movie

Rent. This rating was really hard for me especially if you’ve read my previous frustrations. Rent it for the story alone. Otherwise watch the cut scenes on YouTube or read the book. If it wasn’t for the story I would have recommended that you Pass on the pain. They’ve sold over 1.5 million copies so will probably see a sequel with the same crappy game play.

Here’s my gamercard to show I completed the game.

The Force Unleashed: Elated Frustration

I’ve shared my initial thoughts about the game in the past, but recently I’ve forced myself through the pain (“I need my pain!”–sorry wrong sci-fi franchise reference) and have started to finish it.

I just completed the star destroyer level.

I want to go on record and say that it is the most wasted potential of an epic moment in a video game of all time. To put it into a frame of mind, most fans had never even thought of the idea of pulling down a star destroyer using the force. LucasArts really had something there. It really got people hyped up and was a major selling point of the game.

How could they even package it and call it entertaining? Who signed off on it? It is a huge trial and error task of frustration.

The reason being that the quicktime events do not match the actions on screen. They’re just slightly off. TIP: Ignore the buttons on the bottom of the screen for the most part and just make the star destroyer look directly at you. When the light turns green, pull that sucker down.

The developers at LucasArts must have known that they had the most sucktacular epic fail of a level on their hands so they ramped up the cinematic that follows it.

Those last five minutes were better than the new trilogy movies combined.

The dialogue, plot twists, use of Star Wars cliches (and not being cheesy), camera angles, and voice acting make it one of the best contemporary video game cinematics I’ve ever witnessed.

Forget Clone Wars on Cartoon Network (they might be killing off Jar Jar tomorrow night!), Lucas should have focused on animating this story. I think it’s the best self-contained story in the Star Wars Universe behind The Empire Strikes Back.

The Force Unleashed in 1915

It’s Friday and we need to have a little fun.

I feel, in a way, it made it better.

Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer

This is long. Forgive me in advance.

I honestly believe that Star Wars as an intellectual property has degraded in quality since 1999. The only thing that gave me a glimmer of hope was the character and casting of Mace Windu and the incredible CGI of a three foot tall green creature.

As a whole, I’ve not walked away totally satisfied. However, this is not a Star Wars diatribe.

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed was released this week with a lot of fanfare. George Lucas even showed up at a San Fransisco Best Buy to promote the release. My local Gamestop called me on Monday and welcomed me to the midnight release of the game. I didn’t go.

This was a game that I specifically ignored the hype, “professional” reviews, and other online craziness that is associated with video games. I was getting it based on the demo alone. I had fun with the demo. It was short and the display of force powers I found to be intriguing.

Tuesday afternoon, I spent what was left of some store credit and picked up the game. Later that evening after the boys were in bed, I gave it a try. What’s this? I get to play as Darth Vader? Joy of joys.

Vader walks down the ramp of the shuttle and literally struts his way through Chewbacca’s home planet. I’m tossing wookiees and force choking my path to the goal. Along the way I notice that I might occasionally be attacked from the rear without warning or I’ll be hit from some blaster fire off screen. That’s interesting. I don’t remember that happening much in the demo? It’s no big deal. This is Darth Vader they are up against. The loss of health is minimal.

When three wookiees or more (or storm troopers–blast them! Get out of my way) show up on the screen the game pauses for a second or two. No, it’s not LucasArts bullet time. It stops. I thought I had inadvertently hit the pause button. Nope. The game is chugging. Interesting.

I reach the end of the level and toast the Jedi I was sent to kill. Cue the awesome cutscene of Vader adopting a son–which I actually find to be kind of creepy knowing that he has a son. Next, we cut to years later and the boy is all grown up now a shadow of the Dark Lord. Vader’s idea of testing him is to constantly put him in impossible situations and even have his protocol droid programed to kill him at any opportunity. The boy Starkiller’s job: hunt down the Jedi Vader is too lazy to go after.

The first real test for Starkiller is to infiltrate a Tie Fighter factory and kill a Jedi who is attempting to sabotage it. This is an awesome premise. I’m an Emperor’s Hand so I finally get to see where my favorite sci-fi ship of all time is made. Apparently, it’s a bunch of silver rooms that are connected with some silver hallways. It’s crammed full of saboteurs who have wonderful guns that shoot lasers so fast you twitch faster than Han shot Greedo. The best way to deal with them is to toss them aside with the Force. I guess using the Force takes too much concentration because you have to be perfectly still to use it. Dang. Twitching.

I enter some rooms and clear it out only to wait a second or two and it’s full again. Yay! It helps when you want to explore. Where did these guys come from? Didn’t I just toss someone here and just look away? Hey, where did these four guys come from behind me without warning? Oh, neat, two have laser Gatling guns. Twitching.

Eventually I reach the end and cinematically dispatch the Jedi. This cutscene raises the bar some more. He senses something…a presence he’s not felt. Wait. There’s nothing there at all.

Vader’s happy. His voices his pleasure by giving me a hot pilot to distract my training and sending me on a mini-vacation to a planet who’s entire surface is a junkyard. Neat. One planet is an entire desert, one a swamp, one a city, one a volcano, one an ocean, one a jungle, one a forest, one an ice ball, one a cloud, and I get sent to the junkyard. The goal: kill another Jedi.

It’s not too bad. Just a lot of jumping. Oops. Missed. It’s not too bad. Just a lot of jumping. Oops. Missed again. It’s not too bad. Just a lot of jumping. Oops. Missed again. I finally make it into a trash heap of an old space ship. Man, I hope the Rebellion doesn’t find out about these droids that “protect” the junkyard. Shoot. I hope the Rebellion doesn’t find out about any of these enemies for that matter. If they were to unify to fight the Empire we’d be goners.

I can’t think about that. I’ve got to drop this huge girder to make a bridge. Hmm. Some more droids. What’s this? A large driod? A little Force lightning should do the trick. I have no idea what “X” and “Y” are but I have to hit them before I see them. I wish I had Force insight. The first Jedi I killed was a little bit this way. I had to know what letter to hit before I saw them: A,B,X, or Y. Whatever that means.

Ok. The mega-droid is dispatched. I need to lower the girder. Yay for the Force. Now I just get to walk across. Hmm. Misstep. Didn’t see that coming. Oh well, I beat a mini-boss, it should have auto-saved, right?

Huh? I get to do it all over again? Ok. The mega-droid is dispatched again. I need to lower the girder. Yay for the Force. Now I just get to walk across. Made it this time. Oh, a jump. Here goes again…

Another ten minutes later. The mega-droid is dispatched again. I need to lower the girder. Yay for the Force (sigh). Now I just get to walk across. Made it. Oh, a jump. Here goes again.

Ok. The mega-droid is dispatched again. I need to lower the girder. Dang Force. Now I just get to walk across. Made it. Oh, a jump. Curse the Emperor!

The mega-droid is dispatched yet again. I need to lower the girder. Sense the Force my butt. Now I just get to walk across. Made it. Oh, a jump.

It’s then that I put my controller down, embrace the dark side, and literally Force pull the disc from the 360 tray (yeah, the tray on the console is not working right either). I hover the case in mid-air and place in the disc.

It goes back to Gamestop tomorrow. I’ll watch the cutscenes on Youtube. Take a breath.

This was a game that failed for me on all points. I so much wanted it to be good. One of my unwritten mantras is that I do not want to be frustrated playing a video game. Ever. I look at a video game as a place of enjoyment, a place of escapism. If I want to be frustrated, I’ll watch the news. This is something that I paid money to enjoy. A lot of money.

I think I’ve reached my limit of paying premiums for these games that consistently fail to deliver. I went into this with almost no expectations and it still frustrated me more than it impressed me. There is no excuse in 2008 to have to navigate a camera, fight crappy AI (filling a room full of baddies to compensate does not a good game make), navigate illusionary jumps, and repeat a large section over and over just to make a jump. The save feature on this game was pointless. You constantly were put back to the closest auto-save no matter where you saved.

I wanted to play this game to completion to write up a 2 Minute Review. I don’t even think it’s worthy of that. I’ll give you a 2 second review:

VERDICT: -, do not pick this game up unless you have a biblical dose of patience, like to be stabbed in the back, and then and only then see it in the bargain bin.

I hear the game has one of the best Star Wars stories that reaches a pinnacle higher than the recent trilogy or Clone Wars Crap. I should have saved my money and bought the book.